Relationships can be challenging to manage for anyone. However, the real problem arises when you are in a relationship with an abusive person. Such people may not be physically abusive, but threatening behavior of any kind is also dangerous. Often the victim might try to appease the person by adapting to his conditions. However, this is not right either, and here we will tell you how you can handle abuse.
Initial dealing with abuse
It is over a period of time that the victim realizes that they are being abused. If leaving the perpetrator is not an option, you can try the following:
- Set boundaries and decide when you will not be able to tolerate any more bad behavior
- Educating yourself about the abuse and what you can do to tackle it.
- Work on your confidence and find out about personal development courses in Singapore
- Trying to talk to a neutral party
- Disclosing the situation to your family
- Documenting all that is happening
- Create an exit plan to make it easy for you to come out of the mess
You have to understand that it is not your fault that they are abusive. Do not try to analyze each and every comment they make about you. Obviously, these are ploys to make you react. You have to try and remain calm and not react when provoked. Please take a deep breath whenever they start the rant and resist the urge to revert back.
Do not get engaged on an emotional level
When people know you are emotionally connected with them, they try to derive happiness out of hurting you. The moment you realize the abuse try to withdraw your emotional needs. Abusive people do not change easily. Maintain a confident expression and show that you are not affected by their behavior anymore.
Remain in a safe position
Remember that verbal abuse can, at any point in time, turn physical. Hence whenever there is a confrontation, make sure you are at a place from where you can escape easily. Keep an eye on the exit gate so that you can go out of things are messy. If you think maintaining eye contact could be dangerous, you may look elsewhere while communicating. Just make sure you are on guard at all times.
A lot of people blame the other party for provoking them into abuse. In any conversation, make sure you do not dig up the past or say things that could provoke them. The abuser will never be able to control himself if you do that. Eventually, he will blame you for whatever happened. If possible, try to call a neutral party for help in case you have planned to confront the abuser.
Abuse of any kind is hurtful to the confidence of a person. Suppose you are also facing something like that try and adopt the above strategies. You can also undergo a personality development course as that would help you build on your confidence. With that new spirit, you will be able to handle the problem better.