Gallup’s Global Emotions surveys ask people in more than 140 countries whether they felt things like anger, worry, enjoyment or sadness the previous day. More than once, they have placed Singapore at the bottom of the list for reporting strong emotions. Headlines tend to treat that as either a joke or a point of pride.
It is probably neither. It does not mean Singaporeans feel less. It may mean we say less, notice less, or have learned that composure is the safe option.
Composure has a price
Staying steady under pressure is a real skill. Most workplaces, families and schools in Singapore reward it, and for good reason. The trouble starts when composure becomes the only setting. Feelings that never get named do not disappear. They show up as tension in the shoulders, short tempers at home, a flat “I’m fine” that never quite feels fine, or sleep that does not refresh.
What happens when you put a feeling into words
A well-known 2007 study from UCLA, led by Matthew Lieberman, scanned people’s brains while they looked at emotional faces. When participants put a label on what they saw, activity in the amygdala, the brain’s alarm centre, dropped, and areas of the prefrontal cortex linked with regulation became more active. In plain terms, naming an emotion helps to calm it.
It is a small act with a measurable effect, and it takes about five seconds.
“Stressed” is not a feeling
Most of us stop at broad words: stressed, tired, fine, okay. But “stressed” can mean anxious about a deadline, resentful about extra work, embarrassed about a mistake or afraid of letting someone down. Each one needs a different response. The more precisely you can say what you feel, the more options you have.
In NLP coaching, we help you build that vocabulary, and also notice where the feeling sits in your body and what it is trying to tell you. For more on how we think about wellbeing, read what mental wellness really means and mental wellness beyond mindfulness.
When feelings are older than the situation
Sometimes a reaction is far bigger than the moment deserves. That is usually a sign that an older experience is being triggered. Approaches like Time Line Therapy are designed to release the emotional charge from those older memories so that today’s events can be met as today’s events. Our post on going beyond talk therapy explains how. A hypnotherapist in Singapore can also support this work through relaxation and guided imagery.
Try it this week
Three times a day, stop and finish the sentence “Right now I feel…” using a word that is not stressed, tired or fine. Write it down. After a week you will know your own patterns better than you did before.
If you would like a guide, our team is here to talk, and our coaching and hypnotherapy services are open to anyone ready to start.